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Sunday, March 18, 2012

Near Moussaka: Because Nobody Really Likes Bechamel Anyways

As I seem to have been largely skirting the Mediterranean with most of my postings so far, I thought it'd be appropriate to throw out a moussaka recipe that I've been kicking around for the past three years or so.

I've had a total of three memorable moussakas in my life, which is something you don't usually say in public, let alone on the internet for fear of a lifetime of ridicule. However, as I feel indebted to the dish, I think it's a risk I'd be happy to take. But before we get into this, a word of advice: Never eat before you go to Cairo. Eating in Cairo is fine, if not particularly rewarding, but it's the transit that'll make you pay (especially if you fly Egypt Air).

Explanation: Prior to my visit in 2008, I unfortunately chose to eat a Caesar salad at Sky Harbor International Airport in Phoenix before leaving for Egypt and somewhere over the Atlantic was struck by the 8th and least dignified plague of Egypt, causing me to expel whatever entered my body through the nearest orifice for roughly 3 days straight. I managed to horrify two entire transcontinental flights with my retching and sobbing in the bathrooms, and was for some reason allowed out of the Heathrow Airport looking like I'd contracted zombieism. After 3 days of moaning and sipping water on a tile floor, I was dragged off to the historically impressive Cafe Riche in downtown Cairo, which is dead around midday for you tourist types, where the first food I managed to keep down in days was moussaka. It probably kept me from dying, hence my fondness.

Since eggplant is ubiquitous to the Mediterranean region, most areas have some variation on the tomato + eggplant + onion theme, and most taste just fine. The fruit itself is kind of an interesting character. Over here they call them either betanjan or aubergine, which I think is a much sexier name for such an obscene looking fruit. It's technically related to both the tomato and potato, which are all variations on the nightshade, which is a delightfully effective poison. In fact, when they first made their appearance in the Near East, tomatoes were referred to as "Frankish eggplants," to indicate their origins and to make the locals suspicious.

Since moussaka is already a labor intensive dish, I never make the bechamel sauce that it calls for since it's just easier to shred cheese on it. I think it's actually an improvement, but if you want to waste 30 minutes of your life, be my guest. This requires several stages, so get ready:

To be honest, this is closer to an eggplant lasagna than a moussaka since I don't use potato or bechamel, but it tastes nice and is in the same ballpark, so let's not get hung up on details.

Ingredients:
a lot of olive and vegetable oil
1 large eggplant
1 lb ground beef
1 onion, finely minced
4 tomatoes, stewed, skinned and blended
1/4 c tomato paste, blended with the stewed tomatoes
6 cloves garlic, blended with the tomato
1 cup shredded mild white cheese (like mozzarella)
2 bay leaves
1 1/2 tbsp balsamic vinegar
splash of red wine
8 whole cloves
1/4 tsp allspice
1/4 tsp nutmeg
1/2 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp thyme
salt
pepper

Step 1:
Thinly slice your eggplant (maybe 1/4 inch thick) then layer in a strainer, sprinkling salt over each slice. This draws out the water in the fruit, which is allegedly bitter, though I've never had problems.

Step 2:
The sauce. You can do this ahead of time to allow the spices to combine with the sauce better. Clove is especially shy unless it's been given time to steep. Cook the minced onion in a few tablespoons of olive oil until it's clear, then add in the ground beef and brown. Drain off the fat, then add in the tomatoes, bay leaves, garlic and spices. Cover and let it cook for about 15 minutes. Add the wine, balsamic, salt and pepper and cover. Turn down heat to very low to keep warm.

Step 3:
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees (Fahrenheit, for you foreign folks, Celsius would be disastrous).

Thoroughly wash off your eggplant slices to remove the salt and pat them dry on paper towels. Since this country doesn't have paper towels for some ungoldly reason, I just used old kitchen towels. Fill the bottom of a large frying pan with vegetable oil and heat it to medium high, putting a bit of salt in the bottom. Fry up your eggplant slices and reserve them on pieces of paper towel (alas.) to remove some of the oil. These little bastards will suck up oil like crazy, so make sure you squeeze them out on the pan with a spatula every now and then. You'll know they're done when they're a beautiful brown on both sides, look withered and smell sweet.

Step 4:
Put one layer of your meat sauce on the bottom of the pan, layer eggplant over the top of it, then a layer of cheese. Now... add one more layer of sauce, a layer of eggplant, then a layer of sauce and a layer of cheese. Stay with me here.

Step 5:
Pop in the oven for 30 minutes. Then, and I can't emphasize how important this is, LEAVE IT ALONE for 10 minutes. It'll cool slightly and keep your sauce from flooding out everywhere immediately. You'll thank me, I assure you.

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